Thursday, February 09, 2006

A Poetic Interlude form JenJen

Because today has been rather difficult, I have decided to yield the floor to JenJen, a friend of mine who spun this lovely yarn yesterday about a converstaion she overheard between two of her coworkers over a cube wall. For the unitiated, JenJen is graduate of the University of California Berkely, Newport Beach Party Girl-turned-Mother of two, and an aspiring functional alcoholic. So, printed with permission and some slight editorial changes, I present to you a typical day on floor 2. I warn you, though I do love her writing style, it is sometimes a bit hard to follow. I open the comments box to any interpretations of what this situation might be:

Something something about souflees in his riveting gay or rich guy voice, which tight white is neither of both. My boxster this. My wife is a goddess.

Strangely introverted but really extroverted wild thang enters the room to invite the witty advice of tha dub on next date with match guy. She never thinks to consult normal, alcolholic, b!tch…which, frankly has the best chances or even verbose communicator across the hall who surely knows about the shine of fine china.
Tha dub’s response “well, in school shorten the guys last name….and well Whi+aker…you’ve come to the right place….you know, Whit”

Prize winning email to match guy!:
“If we’re both making dinner, who has to put out”
to which strangely introverted freaky girl says yes and thanks tha dub. I concede, you are right, she has a wild side.

What a load of cr@p!

Isn’t there somewhere we can squeeze the budget to bring you back for a couple of weeks? When is Julie’s graduation?

Walking back in from my proud 2 mile jaunt around the block…some story goes on: “She was a teacher and she saw me standing out in the yard and she stopped me and I can’t tell the rest, but I see it in my head.”

and “I just received the best news. As soon as I leave for my trip to Thailand, timing has it that I’ll get a shitload of money and such. Tha whole trip will pay for itself. I paid off all my past back taxes and I paid off all my credit cards. I’m not going to have to pay a mortgage (to house you didn’t own before you married last month) He’s going on and on and on still….10-14 business days to clear …done. …boom…how. Oh! My God! (with a quik twinging shake of his head).”

Guantanamo’s got nothing on tha dub. Obviously his skill set isn’t being put to the best use here at OCSC.

Why the he!! should I know the intimate details of tha dub’s fabricated $exual past? This is the part of the whole job that makes me the most angry.

I’m so almost nearing postal

Pleeeeeze let me out!

My days are numbered. My flask is cool, black leather and stainless. Sparkling on my shelf at home just waiting, waiting, for the day old jenjen gets fired….much like mr. hobbs takes a vacation.

Pray for that day my friend…a day like no other….a resignation of envy.



At 9:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

none of this makes any sense to me. what does it mean? thanks for wasting our time.

At 10:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

isn't the flask supposed to be carried around in a purse or something? What is the point of a flask on a shelf at home?

At 12:57 PM, Anonymous jenjen said...

This is severely lacking in pictorial detail, and might I add background incriminating history. All of which I saw posted yesterday and has been drastically altered.

The flask will turn into a fifth of Jack and a shot glass when I borrow my aunt's s55 and drive to work so they can escort me to the car after I drunkingly tell Tha Dub about how worthless his boxter and little condo are...and I may kick his car. Because I will be wearing some sweet shit kicking boots and a mini hiked to my chin so that my boss is afraid to look at me.

This my deepest fantasy. So much so, my 12yr old knows about it and is being paid off in gold chains, wife beaters and promise of an from Wal-Mart and promise of an Escalade at 16 in an attempt to bribe him from telling my in-laws

it will happen soon too. I plan to record every moment of it too.

Sorry for the wast of time, but dillusion is so great. i'm not very nice.

At 1:28 PM, Blogger angel, jr. said...

That was surreal.
Who is anonymous that keeps leaving comments

At 4:40 PM, Blogger White Dade said...

Unlke you, JenJen, I am tnot trying to get fired. So I took down the backgound info. Should I lost my cush gig with AL, trust me, that's my first post.

Angel - A lot of people. A lot of people who don't like me.


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