Tuesday, May 08, 2007

We're Not Working More, We're Fucking Off More

I hear people bitch all the time about how everyone is working longer hours and in the office so much and has no time for themselves and blah blah blah. Wa, wa, wa. And while it may be true that folks are spending more and more time in the office, and less and less time at home, I would not call what people are doing more “working.” What they are doing more of is fucking off.

Lets face it: I am guessing at least half of you reading this right now are on the clock. And I truly appreciate you taking your paid time to read my daily rantings and ravings. But that being said if you did not spend so much time reading my blog, and other blogs, and MSNBC.com, and ESPN.com, and whatever other non-work related link you have under that “favorites” tab, you could probably be home in time to catch Dr. Phil. But as it is, you have fantasy teams to update, celebrity gossip to read, airline tickets to book and bills to pay. So you should be checking out around 7:30.

This is not to mention the various personal phone calls that you need to make or idle office chit chat you will have with coworkers to kill time. Part of this blame falls on employers, as there are some managers who insist you stay at a job for nine hours when you only have enough work to fill four. Of course, if you make that known to them, they may cut your time or, even worse, realize you are expendable and lay you or your buddy off. So you find things to do to fill your day so that you can justify your existence. But we all know the most important client file you have on your desk is called “Minesweepr.”

I am of the firm belief that if everyone came to work, worked straight through save for a lunch break and maybe a couple of coffee breaks, and went home we could survive working three days a week. Or maybe just five hour days every day. Either way, efficiency could replace long hours and most of us wouldn’t miss a beat. Yes, I understand there are jobs that require more effort, but a lot of them do not and you know goddam well who you are. Sadly, American culture is such that we value working to excess and so we must find ways to fill our time so we all look busy and productive. No wonder so many in the workforce are miserable.

Cut out the internet surfing and you can spend more time at the gym. Don’t surf the web for airline deals at the office and you might be able to catch your kids before they go to bed. Stop calling every friend you had in college and maybe you could get more than two fucking weeks off a year (perhaps the biggest injustice in the American work system). This is one of the many reasons I’m glad I work a whopping 2 days a week, that I can have more of my own time than most people I know. And I am lucky for that. But the fact is I think if employers just started making office time project-based rather than time-based, companies would become more efficient, they would lose less money on wasted internet and phone time, and people would be happier because they would spend less time at work. But for now, if your asshole boss is making you stay until 6:30, check out my archives on the right. Those should get you to at least lunch.

9 Comments:

At 8:03 AM, Blogger ANON1 said...

Agreed. I see this firsthand but I also take some time off during the day for myself. I work 13 hour days and could really cut it down to 9 hour days. But that decision needs to come from the managing partner, not me. Lots of waste in the office including morons who can't get up on time so they spend 30 minutes taking a breakfast break. Personally I would get rid of 50% of the office just based on work ethic alone.

 
At 8:07 AM, Blogger ANON1 said...

People in America need to toughen up and realize it is called work for a reason.

Too many wannabe American Idols in the world today.

 
At 8:52 AM, Anonymous Desktop Warrior said...

Wait a minute.....let me get this straight....someone who works 2 days a week is lecturing those of us who work 12 hour days all week about the fact that we spend too much time dicking around? I would venture to guess, White Dade, that you spend as much time dicking around on the internet as we do - you're just jealous because you have to do it on your own time.

 
At 11:29 AM, Blogger ジェネヴィーヴ said...

You know that the American and the Japanese work the most hours in the world?

Since when is Anon1 back? I'm so behind on things.

I don't think I'd mind working a lot if it were something I enjoyed versus something I abhorred.
I think a lot of people pick majors and thus get jobs that they're not really into for the $$$. I'd rather be happy than rich. No joke.

Hmmm. Nothing to do. I guess I'll go hang out in Michelle's office. -sigh-

 
At 1:14 PM, Blogger Jordi said...

Fuck, read the archives already and still have 3 hours left until The Man lets me go home. Had to laugh dude, if I wasn't saving half my salary hand over fist so I can buy that beachside bar by the time I turn 35 I'd say fuck it and find myself something better. But the money is good, for now.
Well, at least have the gym to look forward to after work ...

 
At 6:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree with Desktop Warrior, if your theory is correct White Dade, why not get a 9-5 job and get paid for all your dicking around on the computer?

 
At 8:39 PM, Blogger White Dade said...

Anon1 - True. This is why I choose to do as little of it as possible.

DW -Tried that once. Got fired for it.

Gen - Yep. They all do. but it is often hard to find your niche AND be able to be paid for it.

Jordi - Good luck with that.

Anon2 - See my comment to your boy.

 
At 10:41 AM, Blogger Parad0x said...

But for those among us (such as myself) tethered to phones which require us to be "available" to our customers for calls I completely agree.

Fortunately, I can piss off between customers :)

As you've guessed I'm at work and can't say "f*ck".

 
At 8:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey

 

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