Monday, September 10, 2007

If You're Here From the Alligator, Welcome!

In case you are here for a reason other than this story:

No, I am not back. I just wanted to give a quick orientation to the possible new folks who may be coming my way thanks to the good folks at the Alligator.

Today I would like to give the “Hey, I wonder why anyone cares about this guy?” or the “Hey, I think that guy is in my Reporting Lecture” or the “Hey, that’s my TA!” crowd a little primer on White Dade. First, the posts on this page are simply the last few I wrote before I hung up the keyboard back in July. The real good stuff is linked over on the right hand side over there and is probably waaaaay more entertaining and offensive and incriminating than the five or six posts I have on this front page (one of which was not even written by me). So check those out before you call the Dean’s office asking for my removal.

Oh, and that picture on my profile? Definitely not me, Bob. Definitely not me.

For those who wonder what all this is about, apparently some people were a little miffed that I had been admitted to the Journalism School at UF. Miffed enough, I guess, to contact the school and let them know about White Dade. I’m not sure why this is, as we boast an athletic department full of people with extensive criminal records who seemed to get in just fine. But apparently a guy who might be a little frustrated by the inherant language barriers in Dade County should be denied admittance. So the Alligator got wind of it and since UF was playing Little Sisters of The Poor in football last week, and, oh yeah, we're in Gainesville where it's either report about this or the pothole that got fixed over off Waldo, I got a call asking for comment before they ran the story. And so we get what we got here today. Ironic to run it on September 11, don't you think?

This blog once had a readership of about 1500 people a day. Not exactly the circulation of the Alligator, but pretty good for a guy who was bored at work and never promoted his blog past his circle of acquaintances. My most noteworthy post was a scathing indictment of FSU Cowgirl Jenn Sterger which, along with getting me on the radio and linked by dozens of college message boards and Web sites(including UF’s), also got me a free dinner at Hooters with the Cowgirls and barbecue at her parents' house. You know why? Because Jenn Sterger had a sense of humor about it, that’s why. If anyone ever stood to be personally offended by anything I wrote, it was the girl who I described as being “everything wrong with America.” And you know what the first thing she said to me when I met her was? “That thing about me was the funniest shit I ever read.” And then she proceeded to invite me to dinner. Instead of getting mad, she learned to laugh at herself, and at me, and nobody got too bent out of shape.

So before you go digging through my archives looking for something that you can get outraged about, remember to have a sense of humor. Or else it is in fact YOU who is everything that is wrong with America and that, friends, is a lot worse that some girl at a football game.

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